Took me a bit to write this blog. The past few months have been a very personal struggle for me and my family. On November 6th we lost my mother. She was sick for a while but we never would have thought she would pass and pass so quickly, but it happened. We were, and still are, devastated by this loss. She was no longer in pain as she had been for over 10 months and I still at times try to reason it out with knowing she is no longer hurting.
Here was a true matriarch to my family gone way too soon. What would we do without her? I honestly still find myself today asking that question daily with no real answer. I push on every day.
I was one of those people that would see people post about their loved ones passing and thought it strange and odd they would share so much about something so sensitive and personal on a social media platform. I am an open book most of the time but some things in my life always seemed to be for me and me alone. Definitely would never share my grief. Boy was I wrong!
During the process of my mother being ill, and then passing, I found myself frequently on my social media platforms to keep people posted, as it was a means to let people know the status easily since I come from a very large family.
A few things I found with my grieving process and using social media:
I had a way to connect with people that loved my mom. They too had a way to share their feelings, tell stories or just connect with how bad ass she was!
I was comforted in knowing that I let people know what I was going through and that I was surrounded (even if virtually) by caring and loving people. In this day and age, we don’t get to see that all too often on social media. More of this, please!
It was a way for me to continually go back and see her and remember her. All the photos I have of us and our family. The photos she posted, her comments (yes she loved trolling on Facebook as much as the rest of us). This is much easier vs. pulling out the photo albums. She was really with me all the time. Especially since I saved all those pictures to my phone, for whatever reason.
A way to reach out when I’m feeling down or lost. Believe it or not, a lot of people checked up on me via text and messenger, which was very comforting. I definitely needed that. Just knowing that not only was she loved but so was I. She would have liked that.
I am never one to put this out there, I went through a divorce and people didn’t even know it was going down. I am very personal. But in this case, this was a time where I needed to leverage what I had around me, which was my smartphone and social media. It may come across cold to some, but I say wherever you get your strength from and more importantly your comfort, do that! I will never be truly over the loss of her.
I’m still healing and the pain will never go away, but I am learning this process in this new world.